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Andi
Posted: Thursday, August 04, 2011 11:47:00 AM

Rank: Member
Groups: Back Room

Joined: 8/14/2008
Posts: 457
Points: 986
Location: Leesburg
A blonde & her husband are lying in bed listening to the next door neighbor's dog. It has been in the backyard barking for hours & hours. The blonde jumps up out of bed and says, "I've had enough of this" and goes downstairs. The blonde finally comes back up to bed
and her husband says, "The dog is still barking, what have you been doing?"
The blonde says,
"I put the dog in our backyard, let's see how THEY like it!
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Two Blondes with Hammers Lynn & Judy were doing some carpenter work on a Habitat for Humanity House. Lynn was nailing down house siding and would reach into her nail pouch, pull out a nail & either toss it
over her shoulder or nail it in. Judy, figuring this was worth looking into, asked, “Why are you throwing those nails away?” Lynn explained, 'When I pull a nail out of my pouch, about half of them have the head on the wrong end & I throw them away.' Judy got completely upset & yelled, 'You moron! Those nails aren't defective! They're for the other side of the house!'
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

A blonde was driving home after a game & got caught in a really bad hailstorm... Her car was covered with dents, so the next day she took it to a repair shop. The shop owner saw that she was a blonde, so he decided to have some fun. He told her to go home and blow into the tail pipe really hard, & all the dents would pop out.
So, the blonde went home, got down on her hands & knees & started blowing into her tailpipe. Nothing happened, so she blew a little harder & still nothing happened. Her blonde roommate saw her & asked, 'What are you doing?' The first blonde told her how the repairman had instructed her to blow into the
tail pipe in order to get all the dents to pop out.
The roommate rolled her eyes & said, 'Uh, like hello!
You need to roll up the windows first.'
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
These are just too cute not to pass on!!!!

A blonde was shopping at Target & came across a shiny silver thermos. She was quite fascinated by it, so she picked it up & took it to the clerk to ask what it was. The clerk said, 'Why, that's a thermos, it keeps hot things hot and cold things cold.' 'Wow, said the blonde, 'that's amazing; I'm going to buy it!' So she bought the thermos & took it to work the next day. Her boss saw it on her desk. 'What's that,' he asked? 'Why, that's a thermos, it keeps hot things hot & cold things
cold,' she replied. Her boss inquired, 'What do you have in it?' The blond replied.
'Two Popsicles & some coffee.'
+++++++++++++

AND LAST BUT NOT LEAST

A blonde goes into work one morning crying her eyes out. Her boss asked sympathetically, 'What's the matter?' The blonde replies, 'Early this morning I got a phone call saying that my mother had passed away.' The boss, feeling sorry for her, says, 'Why don't you go home for the day? Take the day off to relax & rest.' 'Thanks, but I'd be better off here.
I need to keep my mind off it & I have the best chance of doing that here.' The boss agrees & allows the blonde to work as usual.
A couple of hours pass & the boss decides to check on the blonde. He looks out from his office & sees the blonde crying hysterically. 'What's so bad now? Are you gonna be okay?' he asks. 'No!' exclaims the blonde.
'I just received a horrible call from my sister.

Her mother died, too!'
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